My Photo
Location: United Kingdom

Yes...this is ALL about me, and mine. Marvellously self indulgent, feel free to tell me how splendid I am, leave comments, nice ones please, I have little kids and teenagers who can do the rude stuff. I am a grandma, to the glorious Joshua, I'm allowed to look frazzled and weary, I earned it. The older I get, the more I see that hanging on and being patient is worth it! They ( whoever 'they' are) are so right when they say you never know what is around the corner, it isn't always an articulated truck! It is vital to make the time for making memories, friends are the greatest treasure, I love mine. I am rich!

Monday, April 28, 2008

Nearly tomorrow.

Well then, here we are, the night before. Ooooooh.
That's all I can think of saying because OOOOOHHHH! In 12 hours we'll be on the train.
Elijah helped me pack, he tried on my new flat black pumps, he clopped about upstairs, sat with his legs crossed for a while and then he packed them. He got my going to the theatre ( to see Lion King) outfit from the wardrobe and he folded it ( perfectly) and packed it, he even found a tin of monkey mints and packed those ( for a fresh breathed moment perhaps)
That's all I packed so far ( and I didn't actually pack it, did I ?) I am getting so much worse at the procrastination thing ( or am I getting better at it, seeing as I do it so much more!?) I used to make lists and get ready and keep checking and thinking and checking and worrying and now? Gah.....what the heck. ( hell actually but I feel I have been swearing and being course too much lately so we'll go with heck, as lame as it sounds)
I was so excited earlier that I was a bit like the boys when they know we are going to the Zoo or somewhere exciting, now though I am a bit weepy and emotional and gushingly grateful ( and also sacred because I am me and I do scared so well) I have no idea how people leave their kids a lot, or put them on planes to stay with other people. I know WHY they do it, just not how.
It does children no harm to see their parents have interests and lives outside of being at their beck and call, it's just that H and I actually don't, do we? The boys are our be all and end all. Not all a bad thing but they grow so quickly and the very thought that H and I will wake up one morning and look at each other and stop dead in our tracks, look at each other and ask what now? That would be miserable wouldn't it?
We need this next few days more than we know we need it. We owe it to the boys to take this time and completely suck it dry of every great thing it has to offer.
I have done NO house work, no cleaning or even tidying, my reasoning for this? Dan is divine, we all know that, pretty much perfection. If I could change one thing it would be to stop the way he swears ALL the time, and he blasphemes, til my blood runs cold and my soul begs for mercy.
He is also THE messiest and untidiest person I have ever come across. He will look after these boys and their every need, but will he clean or tidy anything in 3 days? I bet he won't, if I leave this house a mess and come back to a mess, C'est la Vie, tra la la. If I clean and tidy and leave it spotless, no matter how much fun and rest I may get in the next few days, if I come back and it is a pig sty ( and it will be, these kids trash the joint in 2o minutes, we clean and tidy and it's right back to trash in moments) well then I would forget all the fun and just be so MAD!
So, plan A then, leave a mess and come back to little change! Clever me.
I have left notes stuck in various places and then tell myself that we are not leavin for outer darkness, we will not be in Siberia, we will be 4 hours up the road with telephones and email and all manner of methods of communication. I was saying to H today that good heavens, one phone call and he could be back here in a matter of 4 hours, what's the worry about? Panic over.
Whether to ake laptops or not...hmmmm. Well, we should absolutely not waste time online when we could be out and about and seeing and shopping and eating what other people have cooked and placed in front of us, we will be dressing up and, in th evening mind you, going out. However, then we will retire to our room and then H will sleep and eventually I will too but there is a strong possibility that there will b ethose hours between 11 and 3 when I could either sit and stare into darkness and listen to H's gentle snoring, or I could plug in the laptop and chat with friends and write my blog. Not much of a choice.
Of course, who knows, I might have such a busy time that I just crash and sleep like a normal person, in which case it will stay in my case, wouldn't that be great?
My head is very busy lately, the thinking and more thinking, usually that comes with a big slump but this time the thinking isn't dark, it's full.
How do I explain what that means? It's not a head full of endless and pointless thoughts, more a head full of incredible facts.
There isn't a day that passes lately without my being able to see and appreciate that life is going in a good direction, that is still a breath holding thing for me. I suppose it's like someone who has stopped smoking after years and years, suddenly they can breathe easier and taste food again for the first time in years. After so many years of being so sad, I am able at last to think and not be weary. *sigh* I like that.
Dan will be here soon, then I can make his ears bleed with the do's and don'ts, the oh ands and the ooooh nearly forgots. Then he can nod and pretend he cares and is listening and tell me to not worry and I will laugh and say Me? Worry? Of course not and go to bed and worry and then be excited but probably not sleep much.
Is it nearly tomorrow yet?



Blogger noname said...

I've always wanted to see London. Such a wonderful opportunity for you and H. I hope you two have a blast and come back renewed. :)

10:32 pm  
Blogger TN said...

Have a good time! You ARE taking your camera, aren't you?

10:57 pm  
Blogger sarah said...

so enjoy your time away. Sounds like they are in the best hands possible.

11:37 pm  
Blogger LosingSanity said...

Great plan with the house cleaning. I like that one. (Tucks away mental note).

Have lots of fun and enjoy every moment!

12:44 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have a blast and take lots and lots of pictures!

2:42 am  
Anonymous julie bo said...

Have a WONDERFUL trip!

12:17 pm  
Blogger Jenn said...

Hope you're having a great time :)

2:37 pm  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home