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Yes...this is ALL about me, and mine. Marvellously self indulgent, feel free to tell me how splendid I am, leave comments, nice ones please, I have little kids and teenagers who can do the rude stuff. I am a grandma, to the glorious Joshua, I'm allowed to look frazzled and weary, I earned it. The older I get, the more I see that hanging on and being patient is worth it! They ( whoever 'they' are) are so right when they say you never know what is around the corner, it isn't always an articulated truck! It is vital to make the time for making memories, friends are the greatest treasure, I love mine. I am rich!

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Is there such a thing as TMI on a blog?

Personally, I don't think so, the more gory, detailed and personal, the better as far as I am concerned, I love to read a tale of humiliation and personal mortification.
The blogger in me is so strong that very often, when faced with a situation that many would want to ensure would stay secret for eternity, my first thought is pretty much always ! Heh! That'll be such a great thing to write about.
And so today.
I had to go to the doctor, the backache and belly ache, peeing and not peeing and constipation and not, it was all too much and has been going on for too long ( 4-5 weeks now) Everything pretty much hurts in my mid section and when pain makes the whole family miserable and I find myself throwing bottles of water across the room for no apparent reason other than I FEEL LIKE IT SO SHUT UP! It may be time to see someone.
Also, where is my insomnia? That tool that helped me get so much done? It's gone, darn it and I miss it. I now fall asleep at midnight, wake up at 6-7 and then, when the boys go to school at 8.30 I go back to bed and usually do not wake up until 11 at the earliest. This was a treat for about a week but now it's ridiculous, my life is passing by while I sleep, I get next to nothing done and I am still tired. All. The. Time. That's not right is it?
So, I went to see my lovely doctor. She is so gentle and kind to me, never makes me feel like an idiot and I am rarely embarrassed when I am speaking to her.
So, with all my details of where the pain is, what is working, what isn't working, etc etc of course she wanted me to 'hop up on the couch'. Ugh.
I've had 6 babies, 2 miscarriages, innumerable smears, checks, internals, poking and prodding, I don't get embarrassed anymore. Funnily enough, not even when I drop my drawers and go to 'hop up' on the couch and realise that I am standing right in front of the window, the net free, blind free window that looks right out onto the street and the florists and hairdressers over the road. I just laughed because, well TOO LATE! To worry and what are the chances of anyone having looked up right as I dropped my knickers? If they did, I won't ever know about it ( I hope!)
So, it would seem that my pelvic floor is perhaps not made of iron as I so often brag but perhaps a saggy rubber. I have me a prolapse that can only be rectified with surgery, although it is not a severe one and is not by any means hanging out ( oh my!) Losing weight will stop it getting worse and having babies, so many and so close together is what caused it, along with getting OLD! Not only my face is sagging darn it all. I still don't pee when I laugh or cough though ( unless Cathy or Jenn is in the room and then all bets are off, they could make a mannequin piddle.)
Funny how we never really believe that all that ageing stuff will happen to us.
I really didn't think it would hit me and I am still nowhere near ready for it but here it is, it's getting me. I can only pray for grace as it overtakes me, or a glorious disregard for all things elderly and be disgraceful with pride. ( Which sounds more like fun to me)

I had the most unsettling dream last night, my dad was here and he was hurrying me along, standing in the doorway telling me to "hurry up, come ON, will you come ON?!" I was stuck and couldn't follow him, I was trying to follow him but all I could say was " I can't find my SHOES!" and he left. I woke up with a migraine fit to explode my poor head. It shook me for a while.

So now I wait to see if I still have that UTI hanging about and hope that I will soon feel better. Although Doctor appointments can be pretty great blog fodder.

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6 Comments:

Blogger MJ said...

Obviously, since I blogged about the skin growth on my anus, nothing is sacred to me.

Glad they could give you some answers. Wished I'd been there to see your butt :P

1:35 pm  
Blogger MJ said...

ooops.. that's me Julie Bo... I was logged in under my "secret name" I use for Sarah's school's blog.

1:35 pm  
Blogger Tired Mom of Six said...

I feel your pain, Helen. Indeed I do. No prolapse here (yet), but I imagine I wouldn't be surprised if it happened. We've had the same - 6 pregnancies, 2 miscarriages...although I seem to have had the 6 two at a time over a 16 year period.
I do hope that you start to feel better sweetie...L&M you muches!!!

1:57 pm  
Blogger justLacey said...

Last time my mom was in the hospital, she was very ill and had a dream that was so real that she thought she was dead. She said when she woke up, she was so relieved she cried.

11:09 pm  
Blogger Cathy said...

I pee when I cough. I pee when I sneeze. I pee when I blink. Now I'm waiting for my rectum to just drop out. Walking down the street and oh woops...what's that thing dragging behind me. It's my rectum.

Let me know when yours falls out...

Love you!

11:24 pm  
Blogger G said...

I was wondering what that was on the street of Boston, Cathy's rectum. Noted. :D.
Not TMI not for us. We are here for you through anything. Heck there was me who was in her room for fear of the big D and you still loved me :)

12:09 am  

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