This is it.

We are here, in boston, right now Sophie and I are at Cathy's house, the gang has gone, after a weekend of meeting and greeting, laughing and eating, oh shopping too, the trouble with there being lots of people at one time is that actually, nothing gets done! so much time is spent waiting for people, trying to find people, watching people leave that when it is all over and done, you can't remember who said what, or what you did. What you do remember is the feeling, the friendship and the real and genuine affection. I don't use the 'L' word very often, when I do, I mean it.
I am always startled and also, thrilled by the HA! feeling of "would you look at that? I am sitting here with my imaginary friends who are REAL! How completely marvellous is that? I met some of the children of my imaginary friends this time, what sweet little people they are. Sophie was fabulous with them, the female version of the Pied Piper, wherever she went, there the little people were, they laughed and they laughed and it was splendid to see her with them.
I missed Jenn and Julie, we are at the same hotel as always and when we come down to breakfast, Julie isn't there, when we laugh, Jenn's laugh isn't there too. Jenn has been there though, a life sized cut ot of her, everywhere we have been, there she is but ( shhhh, don't tell flat Jenn but she's a little dull compared to the actual not flat Jenn, bless her missing heart she has tried, she has been to Vinnie Ts the Italian restaurant, the airport, the Mall and well, wherever we have been and we have taken pictures...which I will post when I am back at home)
there have been dramas, on the plane, in the hotel and all fire related, there is a theme and when I have more time I will post about that too, with pictures because, I tell you, wherever I am I think of my blog and even when I am outside at midnight, in my pyjamas, with no bra or even shoes on, I take pictures of fire trucks and fire engines and other people in their pyjamas. I actually did that twice, because it happened twice. The elevator is broken because it jammed and so now we get to run up and down stairs with bags of shopping and cases of water from Target because even if I am on holiday, I am not paying $1.50 for a small bottle of water when I can get a case for $5.
I love that we are here for a week, still 3 more days to go to Michaels and all kinds of glorious places. We are going to Sara's house for dinner, we have been to outlets and Malls, we shall go to even more, but honestly, the best part of all, is just being here and laughing. I lost my funny over the weekend, you know that thing happens where there are lots of people and you find yourself thinking ' Be funny! Right now, go on, FUNNY...do it. Nope, can't.funny is all gone.' Yep, that happened, I did that thing perfectly, I suspect everyone was blown over by how totally unfunny I was.
Naturally, as soon as everyone left I became the most hysterical person in Boston, line after line tripping off my tongue and barely a soul to hear it, the fact that cathy can hear it makes it all fine because she laughs so LOUDLY, it is infinitely satisfying to make her laugh.
There is always much laughter at these meet ups, that's worth flying for and that's saying something when you are as scared as I was this time, this time was a doozy, I got through it by becoming so furious with myself that I refused to give in to it and hold onto the seat in Dans car and beg him to take me home, please, don't make me do this thing, this terrible horrifying thing of going away and having fun for 6 days and spending money I have been saving for months.
My heart has had many moments of taking pictures, those heart pictures that last forever. Heart pictures record phrases and moments so much better than photographs and this trip has stored so many.
I heard Sophie say " I hope I have a son like him one day" when she was talking about her big Brother. I have felt almost indescribable love for her this week, because she is growing and learning and is so much less afraid of letting her sweetness show, the steely shield she used to hide behind is almost all gone, she is such a sweet person and I made her. I am so clever.
I have many pictures to post and stories to tell but I need my laptop and my glasses, poor broekn glasses and pooor Me, missing all kinds of bargains because I can't see anything but a blur unless it is 3 inches from my nose.
We will be home on friday.
I have learned, more than ever, that I really don't belong anywhere that H isn't. I can have fun and I can laugh but I miss him so.
I adore my children and I miss them when I'm not with them but they aren't mine to keep, they are just to borrow while they grow and when they are grown and Ihave done my job, they will leave and just visit....H is mine to keep. I don't have to get used to the idea that one day he will leave and just visit. I miss him very much.
We are headed back to the hotel so I will finish for now...excuse typos and mistakes...just love them because they are mine!!!