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Location: United Kingdom

Yes...this is ALL about me, and mine. Marvellously self indulgent, feel free to tell me how splendid I am, leave comments, nice ones please, I have little kids and teenagers who can do the rude stuff. I am a grandma, to the glorious Joshua, I'm allowed to look frazzled and weary, I earned it. The older I get, the more I see that hanging on and being patient is worth it! They ( whoever 'they' are) are so right when they say you never know what is around the corner, it isn't always an articulated truck! It is vital to make the time for making memories, friends are the greatest treasure, I love mine. I am rich!

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Some of those questions...

Life is full of unanswered questions isn't it? Where did I come from? Why am I here? Where am I going?

Actually I can answer those quite easily and satisfactorily, there are some questions though that I may never know the answers to.

Like where is all this snot coming from? I have a snot problem today, running and sneezing and spluttering and more running of the nose. I know that 8 pregnancies and 6 babies have pretty much left my head empty, my babies stole what precious little firmness and beauty my body had, they also sucked all the best grey matter from my brain and kept it for themselves, empty head syndrome is now mine.

Even with all that space I am befuddled as to where all this snot can be coming from. Also, is it heavy? When I have blown it all out will I weigh 32 lbs less? Should I keep the tissues and weigh them and naturally expect that my body weight that much less? Because despite peeing like a racehorse every 3 1/2 minutes, blowing a head load of snot out every 2 3/4 minutes, eating like an anorexic teenager I am NOT LOSING WEIGHT. Answer me that question then, why? I want the thinness, the 'OOOOH look at me wearing regular clothes' deal, the " Hmmmmm shall I go into this every day store and see what is TOO big for me now" feeling. I would like those feelings NOW, or at least SOON because the dieting thing? That is great when you see it working, is beyond uplifting when you see the fruits of your labours, but when you're is a grumpy making ordeal.
It's sunday and yet again I am staying home from church as the Eli boy keeps getting diarrhea, he doesn't seem ill, is perfectly happy but ewwwwwwwww , sort of happy he IS still in nappies, especially when I am asleep and he climbs on H. Can't take him to nursery because I am kind and thoughtful.....that kind of nuclear fallout, whether in a nappy or not, should definately be kept within the confines of our home, where wipes and copious plastic baggage and air freshener are all in great supply.
So I shall be here, with my running but stuffed nose will cope with the effects of Elijah's bowels. H takes the others with him, despite Seth's weekly bout of hypochondria, today it was the sunday stiff leg and nausea syndrome. Fresh air and exercise was the cure, a walk to church and all will be well, he was told. He seems unconvinced, funny that! Wonder what he will be like when he is 12......perhaps I shan't think that far ahead, it's be kind to myself day.

They are back and ~i sort of used the time wisely, had a nap with the boy, made dinner and cleared the dining room that is now grandpa's room, hemmed the curtains and it is now ready for the bed. I like it as a spare room, it was never used as a dining room, except to dump all those things in that we couldn't be bothered to find a home for.
Ironing? Don't want to do it yet, dump it on the table in the dining room.
Shoes? throw them in the dining room.
Toys? chuck 'em in there....
I held my breath when walking past in case a monster grabbed me, one that had been hiding in all the stuff. Thinking about it, I maybe could have hidden myself in there for some peace and quiet, no-one would ever have thought to look, darn it if I don't always come uo with the best ideas when it's too late. I am mistress of the smack down line..ab out 2 days after it was needed.

It feels a bit grand to sya we have a 5 bedrommed house too, " oh 5 bedrooms, town house you know, actually we live in ***********" I almost wish I could tell you where we live because it really IS a grand part of town and people sort of courtsey when I tell them. Until they walk past that is and hear that we aren't royalty and see that tnat neither H nor the rain has washed away the homicide-like stains from the painting fun the boys had not so long ago, gramma was quite touched by the little green footprint still on the path....hoorah for gramma's, it just sort of makes me get cross with everyone ( but me) that hasn't cleaned it up. I don't see why I should scrub it, I was the perfect mother who set it all up and then stopped the paint fight and scrubbed the kids. I bet I'll cave and do it before grandpa and Kara come next week though, we want them to think we are worthy of a bit of bowing and courtseying.If only for 3 minutes til they see the truth.

I'm a little sorry for Kara that she is going to be subjected to the toilet seat and floor syndrome that this house suffers from. She is a lady and childless as yet, it is going to be shocking for her to discover that no matter what she tries, how hard she prays, how much she wishes it weren't true, she will never be able to walk into either of our lavatories and just sit down and pee. Not without mopping and wiping and putting seats down ( WHY? HOW? When they seat is NEVER down, do they still manage to PEE ON IT?! do they pee and then think ' sheesh I peed again, better LIFT that seat so mum doesn't see I wet it? Nah seems far too complicated)
the older they get the more they splash. I give in, I am resigned to the not being able to sit and wee for at least 7 1/2 minutes while I clean up after the dash and splash brigade that I live with. They are mine though, Kara might be so appalled that therapy might be in order when she gets home. We'll see. I'll try and warn her in a gentle but firm manner.
Oh, look, while I am appearing all had hearted and unsmooshy about my little boys, an art work, from clever he is. I can prove that there are times when even a sweet picture of a dog, drawn by your 5 year old, WON'T make you go all gooey and awwwwww bless him. Wanna see why???

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

That's why. On the church shirt. Unwashable pen. Another question, WHERE DID HE FIND THE PEN?!??!??!?!


Blogger -Lo said...

When Em would have the runs i would cover the couch and such with sheets. I dont know why. For somereadon it made me feel better.

Blame the snot. Last week I blamed my gallbladder.

It is frusterating when you try and nothing happends. Are you drinking all of your water?

Ive been on a slump0 since March. Icky eh? But at no fault of my own.

This is what I did about the pee on the seat problem. although I only have one "Pee'er" while you have three.

I told him (In all seriousness) That if i didn't stop sitting in his piss then i would make him sit in mine.

Why shoulnt i dribble pee on the seat and make him experience that icky sensation. Most times you dont even realise until you get up....Ick....Hope it helps.


3:05 pm  
Blogger Susie said...

Thanks for visiting me, and for your prayers. I'm glad I stopped in here. You are very funny. Sorry about the snot-head. And that is a very fine doggy on Seth's church shirt :)

5:32 pm  
Blogger Jenn said...

hehehehehehehe - A bit of gleeful smirking (NOT laughing) that it's not my boy with marker on his shirt (at least not yet). I do sympathize with you though. I know not the properties of snot. It seems to reproduce with reckless abandon, and has the amazing talent of coming OUT of our body in grand proportions, while at the same time making your head as heavy as a 20lb bowling ball.
Hope you are feeling better soon - and I'll have to send you a tide2go pen for the shirt! (I swear, I AM sending you a package - it's almost ready)

6:57 pm  
Blogger Julie Julie Bo Boolie said...

More important question.. what exactly is that doggie doing?

Oh Helen.. as a Mom who's just stain treated a bazillion shirts and shorts and skirts and dresses you have my sympathy.



7:01 pm  
Blogger oh evil one said...

well i love the shirt. he'll probably want to wear it every sunday now. where do they get the ideas? i can still remember writing my name on a wooden toybox my dad made with marker and carving my name in pen on the arm of a small wooden rocking chair i had. i still to this day don't know what posessed me, but i can tell you it never occured to me that i would get in trouble. not once.

9:41 pm  
Blogger Lisa Goldstein/Kelly Kelly said...

Ugh. There's always a pen, isn't there?

the human body's ability to produce endless amounts of mucus has amazed me as well.


12:07 am  
Blogger HANS said...

Greetings from Louisiana aboard the River Witch: Good news! L'Boss (King)is doing great! I just heard from Miss Shay! He's just ducky! Thanks for all your comments. I seem to live for comments! Yours are so nice! Love Hans

12:54 pm  
Blogger Julie Q said...

One time Eddie put permanent marker on my work shirt (I used a sharpie at work and left it in the pocket.) I used hairspray and it eventually came out. I don't know about that white shirt though!

I hope your head if feeling better soon Helen.

I caught my little boy one day, seat up, peeing straight across, through the seat to the lid. Some sort of game he said. AUGH!

1:00 pm  

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