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Yes, I am cool. It's official.
Oh my good grief. I am so stupid that I even amaze myself.
So, H and I have this job at church, achievement evenings with the 8-12 year olds, fun and learning and, well everything that comes with 8-11 year old children, dear life.
This evening was a welcome and well done and graduation evening for the new ones and the old ones. Hello and goodbye as you will.
All arranged by the old runners of the evenings, hoorah, just had to be there really and show my face, which I did. A bit late but what the heck, who cares I have nothing to do, just be there ,observe. That sort of thing.
'Hi!' Said the other Helen, organiser of everything and cool and together and rememberer of all.
'Have you got the certificates?'
( insert look of undiluted idiocy here, on my face naturally)
" The certificates, the graduation ones for the girls " ( that I was given on sunday and promised to sign with beautiful calligraphy type writing with posh pen that I was going to buy, then laminate for all time, so 4 little girls who have completed their programmes and tasks and goals over the past 4 years could save them and cherish them)
"Ack, um. NO! but I can go and get them except I can't because I didn't come on my car ( and I haven't done them or bought the pen or know where the laminater is) Sorry, oh sorry.
Phew no matter, Sunday will be good.
10 minutes later.
" Helen" said the other Helen ( organiser and rememberer) " are you OK to do your bit?"
( insert look of panic and utter idiocy here, on my face, of course)
"What bit WHAT bit?"
"you know, the welcome to the new children and the bit where you boost them on and make them excited for all you are going to be doing next year!"
" oh that bit...yes of COURSE!" ( trying to be like Jesus, don't swear or cry or run from the building)
10 minutes later, am introduced.....TA-DA!
"well, this is exciting isn't it? H and I are new here and so are Ethan, Ammon and Brandon, the thing about H and I is that we are a bit of a surprising pair because although we are old, we like to have fun...especially while we are learning.
H has a secret, he has in his head a computer, he remembers everything and he knows almost everything and that is GREAT because in my head is almost nothing and I forget what little manages to creep in there. We are a great team. We are also a bit lazy and so what is going to happen is this......you will be doing most of the work, this is all about you and the things you would like to do and about learning. We will have fun..lots of it, but you will really be doing some work! "
Pretty sure that went down well and that they are all raring to go. I hope.
Why can I not remember anything these days? Sometimes I'm not kidding you I could just sit and weep at how stupid I am. I hate forgetting everything but I am SO grateful that I have become so great at winging it. My mum says that I never show just how much I wish I could become invisible. The most extraordinary thing is this.....stand me in front of one person and I want to disappear, I hate it, I do not want to converse with people , I talk, but inside? I am screaming "GO AWAY! " pleading " please don't talk to me, look at me, ask my anything....please leave me alone" But.....I come alive when given the opportunity to stand up and speak in front of a crowd, the more people the better, I would thrive on being an after dinner speaker. WHAT in the WORLD is that all about??
I am looking forward to the holiday,I am needing the holiday. 4 weeks tomorrow. Not long now.
So, H and I have this job at church, achievement evenings with the 8-12 year olds, fun and learning and, well everything that comes with 8-11 year old children, dear life.
This evening was a welcome and well done and graduation evening for the new ones and the old ones. Hello and goodbye as you will.
All arranged by the old runners of the evenings, hoorah, just had to be there really and show my face, which I did. A bit late but what the heck, who cares I have nothing to do, just be there ,observe. That sort of thing.
'Hi!' Said the other Helen, organiser of everything and cool and together and rememberer of all.
'Have you got the certificates?'
( insert look of undiluted idiocy here, on my face naturally)
" The certificates, the graduation ones for the girls " ( that I was given on sunday and promised to sign with beautiful calligraphy type writing with posh pen that I was going to buy, then laminate for all time, so 4 little girls who have completed their programmes and tasks and goals over the past 4 years could save them and cherish them)
"Ack, um. NO! but I can go and get them except I can't because I didn't come on my car ( and I haven't done them or bought the pen or know where the laminater is) Sorry, oh sorry.
Phew no matter, Sunday will be good.
10 minutes later.
" Helen" said the other Helen ( organiser and rememberer) " are you OK to do your bit?"
( insert look of panic and utter idiocy here, on my face, of course)
"What bit WHAT bit?"
"you know, the welcome to the new children and the bit where you boost them on and make them excited for all you are going to be doing next year!"
" oh that bit...yes of COURSE!" ( trying to be like Jesus, don't swear or cry or run from the building)
10 minutes later, am introduced.....TA-DA!
"well, this is exciting isn't it? H and I are new here and so are Ethan, Ammon and Brandon, the thing about H and I is that we are a bit of a surprising pair because although we are old, we like to have fun...especially while we are learning.
H has a secret, he has in his head a computer, he remembers everything and he knows almost everything and that is GREAT because in my head is almost nothing and I forget what little manages to creep in there. We are a great team. We are also a bit lazy and so what is going to happen is this......you will be doing most of the work, this is all about you and the things you would like to do and about learning. We will have fun..lots of it, but you will really be doing some work! "
Pretty sure that went down well and that they are all raring to go. I hope.
Why can I not remember anything these days? Sometimes I'm not kidding you I could just sit and weep at how stupid I am. I hate forgetting everything but I am SO grateful that I have become so great at winging it. My mum says that I never show just how much I wish I could become invisible. The most extraordinary thing is this.....stand me in front of one person and I want to disappear, I hate it, I do not want to converse with people , I talk, but inside? I am screaming "GO AWAY! " pleading " please don't talk to me, look at me, ask my anything....please leave me alone" But.....I come alive when given the opportunity to stand up and speak in front of a crowd, the more people the better, I would thrive on being an after dinner speaker. WHAT in the WORLD is that all about??
I am looking forward to the holiday,I am needing the holiday. 4 weeks tomorrow. Not long now.
Labels: just stuff.
posted by The other me | 8:42 pm
6 Comments:
Oh please, take me with you!
Oh wow, that brought back memories. When I was a teenager our youth pastor moved away. I was given the responsibilities for all the kids stuff...4-12 year olds. Children's church, sunday school classes, wed. nite classes, children's choir, musicals...... It didn't phase me as I'd been working closely with these groups since I was 11. They decided to recognize me one night but neglected to tell me. I was suddenly called to the front of the church and as I stood there, our Pastor leaned over and told me to give my speech.
I used that time to flog all the children's services and let everyone know we needed helpers and what we did. I did ok, but was a ball of nerves afterwards, lol. Hate being put on the spot like that!
Not long at all! And it sounds so relaxing and fun!
:)
I don't forget stuff so much as I feel like I could sleep at any given moment.
Well, you did an awesome job winging the speech. Better than i probably would have done had i prepared.
I feel the same way about forgetting things and i feel so unorganized and just frazzled. Grrr.
I can't believe your holiday is only 4 weeks away. That means that Christmas is right around the corner, for sure. OH and that huge project for my multicultural comm class....ughhhh.
you are not alone - I just read an interview with Jerry Seinfeld where he said the same thing about stand up comedy. Most comedians do that work because they have no choice - they don't know how to communicate or interact any other way. You are the same personality type as a lot of very successful people! Relieved?
Helen THANK YOU for tuesday and for being MY sister
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