Nearly there.

There is much excitement in our house this evening, Grandpa called to say he is coming for Christmas, we love grandpa and we really love to have him come and stay. I love getting ready for his visits and always try to make his room cosy and welcoming, have the house tidy and warm. It all goes to pot very quickly but as long as it is clean when he gets here that's alright with me.
Sophie and I are leaving for Boston on Thursday, our bus leaves at 5.45am, we get to the airport about 10am and out flight isn't until 4 in the afternoon. Time usually goes quickly enough and nerves help to keep me busy. I am excited when I manage to push aside the thoughts of the flight.
I have a fool proof way of preparing to leave H in charge for any length of time, I make sure every stitch of clothing is washed and ironed and that's it. I don't go around cleaning and making beautiful, I don't tidy and organise, I have leaned that when I go crazy making everything spotless and then I come home to chaos ( because H can clean or he can take care of 3 little boys but both at once? Not so well!) well I get cross and the trip I had seems spoiled, so I leave it untidy and I come home to nothing having been changed and all is well.
So, grandpa is coming and would you believe it, he is arriving the same day that Sophie and I get back from Boston. Uh oh.
We get back at 5am and Grandpa arrives at 12.30. H always takes the bus to meet him from the airport, he loves to do that and I think it is important, when you have flown all that way to have someone meet you. The bus trip is long and after 10 hours on the plane, then had to go though the customs and immigration it is just comforting to have someone with you to get on the bus and make that last leg of the journey.
So we have a couple of problems, one is that there is that gap between Sophie and I getting back and H having to leave to meet his dad. ( I am pretty sure we can get that worked out easily enough though)
Then we have the problem of getting the house clean and ready for grandpa....Sophie and I will have been travelling for 15 hours by the time we get home, we'll be dealing with jet lag that is crippling on the way home ...last time I pretty much slept for 2 weeks. What fun it will be to get back here and have to clean the whole house, move Seth in with the littler boys and turn his room into a lovely escape for grandpa. I think I might do that before I leave and shut the room so they don't get in and wreck it again!
H could do the room and I know he would quite happily but he won't do it the way I would.
( control freak? Who? Me?)
I am just beginning to actually allow myself to think about going back to Boston, it was such an overwhelming experience last time. I wasn't ready for all it did for me and it took a long time to come down from the high and to believe that I had been lucky enough to be there and share in that time. To be able to go again is a huge blessing, I really don't take for granted being able to do this, I haven't allowed myself to think about it until now because it is SO exciting! I hardly know what to think about first....actually I do, the very best bit of the trip is meeting the people, that first moment of seeing those faces and the undiluted joy of it all is indescribable. Last time, of course, we had never met before and it couldn't have mattered less. The minute I saw them felt as if I had always known them and they were all exactly as I imagined.
Julie and Jenn had driven from Canada and were planning on creeping into the hotel, having a nap and then calling us to let us know they had arrived. Heh....they didn't plan on my walking out of my room just as they came out of the elevator. I was SO thrilled to see them, in my normal thoughtless way I wasn't about to let them go and relax before I squeezed them and squealed like an adolescent girlie!
Meeting Cathy was like just meeting up with my oldest and dearest friend, Cathy is the newest kid on the Babyzone block and while the rest of us have 'known' each other for years online, Cathy only found us last year and we are SO glad she did. She is the kindest, funniest person you could ever hope to meet and I can't wait to see her again THIS WEEK...I am intrigued to see Sophie and Cathy together and am pretty sure that it will be a sight to see and hear. Oh yes we will hear a lot of Sophie and Cathy when they are together.
I am sad that some of the wonderful girls that came in June can't make it this time, we will miss them so and we will talk about them remember their fun and glorious selves the whole time.
We are holding our breath waiting to hear if Rachel can join us, she has her ticket and her room is booked, she is also 34 weeks pregnant and has to get the all clear to fly, this baby girl is so special to all of us, we so want to see her mommy and rub that belly while she is still inside. Rachel was my room mate last time, I love her.
I am so looking forward to seeing all the Christmas decorations in the stores, can't wait to go shopping in Target. Walking around the outlet stores, eating in the food hall, going out to eat in the evenings. Ahhhhhhhhh. Bliss.
The thought of those few days of not having to cook, clean, even having my bed made for me, is a little piece of heaven. Such a treat to stay in the hotel, heaven to be able to walk away from all the daily drudgery of buying bread and milk, replacing toilet rolls, emptying bins, picking up paper and socks and empty cups. All the planning and scrimping and saving, all the headaches and hand wringing is so worth it when we get there!
Please can we have the next one in England though? Can we? I would so love to be here and being the one to welcome and plan and chauffeur. Lovely thought!
So, rather than spend the next few days pottering about and slowly packing I am now going to be rearranging rooms, trying to do whatever I can before I leave that hopefully won't be undone the minute I leave! I have to pack and decide what clothes to bring with me. The sensible thing would be to take very few clothes and buy new ones as I am right at the point where I should dump what I am wearing now as they are big and unflattering, I'm sure if I were to start wearing clothes that fit I would look slimmer...I'm not sure I am ready to do that yet though. Who knows why the idea of letting the weight loss show is so worrying to me? I think it may be that in the past, whenever people have started to comment on my having lost weight I stop...something in me panics and I have stopped losing weight. I don't feel the same anymore, I don't feel as though that will be an issue this time at all but still I feel wearing smaller clothes is a big step. Maybe I just want to be able to wait until I can wear much smaller clothes, not just a size or two but go from huge and baggy to look at me! Skinny! ( wouldn't that be great, to somehow hide losing weight and keep wearing fat clothes and then one day just getting up and putting on regular thin peoples' clothes?)
My jeans are falling apart, I really have to let them go soon because they just aren't good anymore. I'll look when I am over there and hopefully find some that make me feel good. I really like the feeling of wearing clothes that are really too big! I was ironing some trousers today and thought " hmm, I have lost 6lbs since I last wore these" that was a good thought to have and I hope to keep thinking that way.
I have to go to the council early in the morning and try to get the whole mess of the rent cleared up, I hope I don't have to jump through too many hoops and that they get on the case and issue that money to me before I go away, it really does mean the difference between managing and being able to do what I want to do for the boys' Christmas. Never a dull moment around here is there?
Eli was so much better today, his tummy seems to be fine and isn't bloated anymore, thank goodness for that. We need calm and stress free days until Thursday and beyond..please!