I blame the parents, kinda.

Ugh. I watched 4 hours of American Idol. I love it, usually. I particularly like the bad auditions. I marvel at how many people get the impression that they can sing, really. I can pick the sad people who have no friends who spend way too long in front of a mirror with the CD player on as loud as it can be, so loud in fact that they can't hear their own voice as it belts along to the song. I see them with eyes closed imagining they are on a stage being adored by all. Even when they are faced with ridicule they reply with courage and real belief that they DO have talent that the judges know nothing, will regret it, are stoopid, and off they go, spirit uncrushed, to sing of their rejection, planning what they will sing next year, when they come back.
Sometimes I cringe so much I actually have to hide my face in shame for these people, at the same time as absolutely loving how terrible they are. It quite makes my week, in a bullying kind of way to watch these people make absolute ninnies of themselves.
However, there is a group of people that I dread seeing, somehow they get through and are added to the ranks of the terrible and shoud be scorned. They are the teenage fragiles and the disabled. Last night I watched a youngish man, who to me, was obviously autistic in some way, sing, with such determination, he was then labelled, mr freak/ geek.
Simon Cowell asked "What the **** was that?" and this sweet young man replied " that was me," his 'weird' tone was mocked ....his intensity was laughed at. And through it all, he just looked puzzled, because he HAD hit the high notes and the low notes and had done things the way they should be done..but he just didn't sound, or look, good. He said afterwards that he would have to watch the recording before he knew what he had done 'wrong'.
Then there are those fragile teens, who beloved by their parents are told how great they are, how beautifully they sing, how stunning they look, how they are destined to be superstars. I suspect this is what their parents see, what they hear. I never get that though, I adore my children, truly I do. I look at them with pride, am outrageously vain about them. I do see their flaws though.
I look at Elijah and my whole being swoons, I can still see he has a little monkey face though, little creature with slightly outey ears, divine and perfect.
I can hear Jordan sing and be touched, but wouldn't pay for him to make a demo tape of any kind.
I am ridiculously proud of my girl child, she is beautiful......I wouldn't though, encourage her in any way, to head for a career as a diplomat.
So, WHY do these parents take their very ordinary, slightly tone deaf, dumpy, spotty, gangly, usually unconfident and slumped over children, to parade their untalented selves before millions and this panel of unmerciful judges?
WHY?
I saw that one 16 year old boy juggling and sort of not singing very well, do his stuff and then get jeered, told he was useless, asked to do even more humiliating tricks to entertain us and then ripped to shreds again. As if THAT wasn't enough, then he is filmed swearing and yelling in that typically teenage way, because he was mortified and disappointed, then, when rage had subsided he wept, real tears and humiliation....his mother hugged him and said
" you WILL be famous, you WILL"
NO. HE WON'T....what she should have done, way before that audition is to say,
" Well, maybe this idea isn't the best. You are pretty good at A B C and we are proud of you, you do know though, that to be a winner on that show you have to be extraordinary at the whole singing and entertaining thing. Whilst WE think you are great, you probably don't have what it takes to win this show. " and then work on what he CAN excel at.
Or, if you are like me and not so tactful with your kids, say ( and I did say it to Sophie when she said she was going to be on the X factor)
" I think not . You can sing, you can. You won't win though because your voice isn't strong enough and you aren't anywhere near bad enough to make it on TV as a 'crap lets make her look stupid' one, so it'd be a waste of train fare, what else do you fancy doing?"
If you are me and then your child then says they will go on Big Brother instead, well then you say nothing, raise your eyes to the heavens and pray, really hard, that she goes off that idea because she IS exactly what they are looking for for that show, big boobs, not a shred of decorum, big gob and a flash temper.
Dear Lord let her go off that idea before next year when she will be old enough to audition. Don't you think I have endured enough in my life without having to see my one and only girl child win that show because she gave so much entertainment? 's not like she would even split the money with me or anything.
Anyway, I digress.
What are these people thinking to allow their kids to put themselves in this situation? Most teenagers are so fragile, especially these ones, the ones I am talking about. Kids that probably don't have to many friends, those quiet shy ones that spend hours alone in their room dreaming of fame and fortune but can't quite open their mouths to talk to real people and have some fun, in the real world.
It is almost as if this particular group are from the same place. I can spot them a mile off, I am pretty sure the auditioners can too, and they rub their hands in glee because THIS is what we're looking for. I think there should be a rule. There should be a mother earth type censor somewhere who edits who can be shown on the show.
I know that if I were on the sidelines I would be able to say
" don't send that one through"
Overweight warblers with no confidence,sweet dispositions and bad shirts are not entertainment, they are just lonely and should be sent on their way, a little disappointed but not crushed.
People with 'empty' eyes, who are stiff and ill at ease, who don't look anyone in the eye but talk in a monotone voice about how they know 'how' to sing because they had lessons and their friends have heard them play an instrument and said they are good...SEND THEM HOME quietly and kindly.

Lumbering big 17 year old girls with bad skin, who have dressed like Britney and say 'everyone says' she is exactly like her......hmmmmm, not sure on that one, let them sing and see just how bad they are.......but probably just send them home without the ritual stripping of all self esteem. Give the stupid mother who allowed her child to leave the house looking like that a smack though, definately.
The 27 year olds who strut and wear Elvis suits, let 'em have it. They probably deserve everything they get.
Boogley eyed fat girls who say they have watched every series of Idol, for every country, who claim to be the BIGGEST fan, who say they are for sure the next American Idol but still, after all those hours and hours of viewing have NO IDEA what the show is all about and STILL think they have it wrapped up, well shove them in and let Simon and Randy have their fix of bullying, they are so asking for it!
Maybe make the large girl with no bra, no muscle tone and a silk shirt understand that no-one is going to get past that fact and advise her that she probably shouldn't dance.
Just someone, please stop those gentle spirits who are trying to find some kind of footing in this world, who are desperate for some kind of acknowledgment, who long for some praise and just need someone to tell them they are of worth, please stop them being sent into that lion's den.
It isn't true that everyone knows what they are letting themselves in for. I can see every week which ones are going to be damaged by that frenzy of meanness. I know I'm not the only one.
I blame the parents for letting them get that far and more for even THEN telling them the judges are wrong, that they DO have what it takes and then probably taking them along to other auditions for even more soul crushing ridicule.
Yet still, I watch.