Sometimes, the words just can't be found.

Today was fabulous. My Isaac ran out of class and could hardly breathe he was so excited.
"OPEN MY BOOKBAG!" he said, over and over. I did and inside was a Head Teachers commenation certificate. I will scan it tomorrow and show you. It is more valuable than gold. He got it for helping his teacher in the production of 'the Smallest Angel'
Remember how he was too afraid to be a penguin and they made him director? He took that so to heart.



I went on the 3rd showing of the play. There he was, my director boy, in his suit, with his clip board, as close as he could be to Mrs Teacher. At one point I saw him lean very close to her and thought ( as it was so hot) that he was weary and was about to lean against her. I caught my breath and waited, wondering if I was about to see a miracle unfurl and see him snuggle his teacher. He didn't, he sort of 'caught' himself and sat back up but he was SO close to her.
When I went to collect him, his teacher was so thrilled.She told me just how incredible he had been and explained that he had so taken his calling to heart. She said that every time her attention wandered, he would nudge her and point to the place on the script so she would know where they were.
She said he handed her pens when she needed them and at all times, knew exactly what should be happening.She was stunned that he knew every line and exactly what song was next and pointed it all out to her.
She must have spoken to the head teacher and he thought that was worthy of one of his commendation certificates.
I was beyond thrilled that Seth had one of these for a project he did well, if I am honest I am pretty certain that throughout his life, Seth will bring home many such awards. He is a brain, he thrives on learning, he adores praise and all things to do with showing how bright and sharp he is, he is a super boy.
This though, this award for my Isaac.....well, what a joy. To see how completely thrilled he is , to see HIS little chest puffed out, to watch HIM show daddy his award and watch as it is placed in daddy's special folder, where it is sure to be laminated and treated as precious beyond any monetary value. Well, these things are what makes every frustrating moment worthwhile.

For every time we have to drag him kicking and weeping silently to do something the rest of us do without a second thought.

For every time I have to find yet another jacket because the one he said he loved yesterday is very, very bad today and can't be worn because, well it might make him die.

For every time I have to pretend that I am not sad he is hiding again.

For every time I have to make out as if I am not embarrassed that he has turned his back on someone because they said 'hello'.

For every day I have to give up on a plan I had because my Isaac just isn't going to be able to go aong with that plan.

For every one of those times, there will be something like today, a little piece of blue paper with hisname on, that shows me is loved and valued and appreciated, even though he is hard work and even though he will never be the same as his peers.
Thankyou Lord, for this little boy who will never be like anyone but his glorious self.