I wish.

There are many times when ' I wish' is the thought of the day. Today was one of those days.
My niece is 27, she is 6 months pregnant with her 3rd baby boy . Last month her husband left her. He said he wanted to concentrate on work and earning money, seems he wants to concentrate on some other woman too.
Today she moved into a rented home because he sold their house.

I wished a lot today.

I wished that I could make her feel better and really know that she will be happy.

I wished that she could see that the second she sees this baby, that she feels will make her more sad, will be what saves her mind on many a lonely night.

I wished that the house she moved into didn't stink of cat pee, and by the time we left it didn't, hoorah for steam cleaners and Vanish carpet spray.

I wished, when I saw the faded old lady chairs that 'he' got her when he took their nice sofa, that I could spit in his eye..when I had a mouth full of sharp nails.

I wished that I could make the pathetic low life scumbag that so easily walked away from this family, squirm and feel a tiny piece of the misery he has caused this girl.

I wished that we could fast forward the clock to a time when Gemma can look out of that new kitchen window and breathe a sigh of relief that he left and she is free to be happy again.

I wished I could look the new woman in the face and ask her why she thinks this man , who has had 2 wives and will soon have 4 children...who has walked out on a heavily pregnant woman and 2 little boys of 3 and 21 months, why she thinks he will make HER happy? What does she think SHE has that will change such a weak and pathetic man? What is it about him that she thinks is so great. I hope she finds out. Soon.

The new house is wonderful, it is close enough that we can all pop over and see her, can play with her babies and give her a break. The sun shone today and we could all see how happy she will be there, all of us except her.
She gulped back tears the whole time we were there. She unpacked boxes and wandered from room to room. She tried to be cheerful to her littlest boy but red eyes and cracking voice gave the game away a bit.

I wished that Gemma knew what I know. I have been where she is, although my baby had just been born when the daddy walked out. I know how she feels, I remembered so well today what that heart pain feels like. I wish I could take what is in my heart now and send it to hers so she could really know that the future is a wonderful thing. Her life can be happy again and it will be.
I wish that she discovers the joys that can come with being a single mother quickly. That when her baby boy is born he will bring with him the peace that she needs to feel joy again .
I don't need to wish that her husband learns the consequence of his selfishness. I know he will. I know he will wake up one day and realise that the thing he was looking for was right under his nose the whole time. He will have lost everything of value, even if he works himself up to be a millionaire.

I pity stupid people, the ones who spend their whole lives in a stupid frenzy of searching for what will make them happy, scurry scurry.....picking apart the people who love them and finding them wanting....wearing themselves out with looking at what they don't have......wondering why the people around them aren't coming up to scratch.....feeling hard done by because something is missing.....stupid people who think it is everyone else's job to make them happy and endless walking away because, argh, why don't they make ME HAPPY????
Stupid people. Stop looking for what makes YOU happy, start working on making others happy.
Cast your bread upon the waters ( and it'll come back buttered)
Stupid man who left this good girl.